Orange You Glad

Found a dried-out orange on my colleague’s bookcase. I had him sign it the day we located it. As a joke, we included it several times with our workshop equipment shipped to multiple locations across the United States. I returned to the original owner thirty years later. 

Convinced a principal manager from Stanford University to join a startup. She taught me several concepts of successful teaching and learning strategies and creating powerful partnerships.

Walked 8 miles in 88 degrees before 8:00 am in Las Vegas while colleagues recovered from their late nights. The temperature reached 122 degrees that day, the hottest I ever experienced.

Was deep in coding a public-facing website when we noticed the quiet library was extremely quiet. Everyone had left but the two guests. We were locked inside the 58th Street Branch of the New York Public Library. We had to reach the second-in-command of the large organization to let us out, ending our two-hour mild panic.

Wrote three pages of code because my colleague, a programmer, said, “It can’t be done.” I was determined to prove my novice programming skills were amazing. After several days of work, I almost got the code to work. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Eventually, I knew I needed to show the code to my colleague--the one I was trying to prove wrong. I approached him with the code, which he trimmed to one page and made the code work seamlessly. I helped hundreds of customers add the custom feature to their websites. After several years, a better version of the code was added to the standard product.

Created a digital database using my daughter’s photos and a few of my wife’s drawings (including a favorite, "Take something that is broken and fix it with art"--the Liberty Bell pencil drawing. I also sequestered help from an Australian colleague to upload the images and tailor the product to fit the customer. All this work was done over a weekend. On Monday morning, I shared the sample product with the customer. Sealed the new deal with a five-year contract.

Invited to a dinner at a client’s home in Eagle River, Alaska, where the road for their subdivision was shared with small planes— “Stop, make sure there aren’t any planes, and then proceed.”

Told a client from Kentucky that she should apply for a job with our company. I was surprised to see her at the onboarding session the next year. 

After several misfortunate events, I was a mile from my Denver hotel at 1:00 am. My ride-share apps were not working. I started to walk with my suitcase and laptop bag. I struggled to follow the walking directions on my phone and ended up in a frightening situation where some homeless people wanted to help or hurt me. I saw an electric scooter--a mode of transportation that I had never used before.  My freezing fingers were able to function, and I rented with Apple Pay. I zipped past Skid Row and gratefully arrived at my hotel unscathed. 

Created a pricing strategy for adding new members to consortia, which grew business in Ontario, Canada, Montana, and Kansas.

Prevented a lawsuit by a customer who had just finished implementing and training over 70 staff members on our forthcoming product when my company announced they were pulling the new product. I negotiated a streamlined implementation of our other platform. They signed a multi-year deal. 

Provided a week of training for the New York Public Library for five summers. Thanks to my friend who was part of the NYPL staff, I got to see Jimmy Buffett and Fleetwood Mac at the Today’s Concert Series. He stayed out all night, reserving a place on the front row.  On one occasion, I showed up early and let my friend use the hotel for a quick nap and a shower. He said that was the best all-nighter. I also saw a possum at a metro station on Staten Island—my first time seeing one.

Borrowed a photo of a Norwegian castle from my colleague's desk and wrapped it for the White Elephant gift exchange. My coworker opened the gift and said, "Oh, it's a nice picture." As she turned to show it to everyone, my colleague exclaimed, "That's mine!" The group all suggested that he had to trade to get it back. 

Helped shrink-wrap every item in a manager’s office to teach him a lesson not to leave an office unlocked while on vacation.

Achieved my exercise, stand, and move goals six days a week. Last year, I averaged 17,612 daily steps. My Apple watch has changed my life and health. 

Drove a customer to a specialty car parts store in Salt Lake City, where she purchased an axle for her Jeep. It was cheaper to purchase and ship from Utah than to buy it in the Virgin Islands.

Borrowed a photo of a Norwegian castle from my colleague's desk and wrapped it for the White Elephant gift exchange. He had to trade to get it back. 

Made chicken parmigiana for twenty former coworkers who attended the funeral of a past colleague. Gathering friends was much better than a “should-have.” 

Play basketball three to six times a week. I am a shooting guard, but not necessarily a making guard. I also believe that if you pass the ball, you lack self-confidence. 🏀

Donate blood to the American Red Cross every couple of months. I have surpassed my five-gallon status.  🩸

Helped build 200 bunkbeds to give comfortable sleeping arrangements for those without. Every two years, our family association holds a reunion and conducts a service project. As Co-Chair of the Reunions, seeing the joy of children who had no bed to sleep on was very rewarding. 

Traveled to Seattle without my wallet that I accidentally left at home. Got through security as I had my passport. My colleague willingly paid for my hotel as long as he would get the points.

Traveled to Cleveland on a cold winter day. I couldn't put on my black wool trench coat when the plane landed. I was like I had gained fifty pounds on the flight. Then I realized I had taken my daughter's coat from the hall closet and left her my trenchcoat.  

Make the best zucchini bread. During COVID, I experimented with the amounts of zucchini, applesauce, flour, and spices. I burnt some batches, and some were doughy. My wife jokingly said that I should have followed the recipe. My grandkids love my zucchini bread, and they named it Bampa Bread. 

Attended the Velo-Cardio-Facial Syndrome conference in Plano, Texas, and convinced the group to hold the conference in Salt Lake City. I secured Michael Leavitt, Secretary of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, as the Keynote speaker. As the group's President, I was particularly proud that we persuaded fifty family members, friends, and community members to volunteer.  We had five hundred participants, including doctors, researchers, and VCFS families.

Discovered that I had left my laptop at home as I went through airport security. My son and daughter broke a couple of speeding laws. They sent the laptop through security, where I was able to thank the TSA agent and run to my gate to be the last one to board. I spent the entire flight calming my adrenalin with gratitude to teenage children.

Learned to rip a phonebook in half.  My colleague emailed the company, telling them I was collecting phonebooks for recycling. When employees learned that it was a joke, they found even more phonebooks. I was on a work trip during the disbursement of new phonebooks and returned to find a wall of the old ones blocking my cubicle. 

Received permission from the Vice President to order a birthday cake to add to our luncheon with a hundred customers. Two colleagues were celebrating the same day (July 8). We sang Happy Birthday, but nobody had a piece of cake since everyone had a dessert. Later, we were shocked when we received the bill for a $400 cake.  🎂

Set the default font to wingdings font on my colleague’s computer. 🕈︎♓︎■︎♑︎👎︎♓︎■︎♑︎⬧︎📬︎

Rode my bicycle to work on fair weather days; too bad there were only five fair weather days over five years.

Shared many insights on customers and their product needs that I gained during my two-day software workshops. I emailed notes to the Sales Team and received the inaugural award, “Everyone Works in Sales.” If your job does not help improve the world directly or indirectly, you should change. 

Learned to pronounce "Jeg har ingen ost," which is Norwegian for "I don't have any cheese." I taught him "Non ho formaggio," Italian for "I don't have any cheese."  He learned that phrase in thirty-nine languages. Just knowing the Norwegian phrase has helped me immensely.